just takin a quick couple seconds to update everyone on whats goin on.

i had a very.....enlightening conversation with a man known as Tom Raider. hes my best friends uncle and a very wise man to talk to whenever you have any problems of any sort....hes the kind of guy that wont tell you straight up exactly what you should do, but instead he uses quotes and examples and just good old "proverbs" to let you make your own decision on things......hes a very good guy.

well, basically in this conversation....he pointed out to me that the military isnt the only option i have....he told me about where he was when he was my age and all the trouble that he went through and said "look at me now"....the guy is completely debt free and owns.....OWNS...like 3 houses and 2 different vehicles, hes got a great family life and has enough time to do whatever he feels like doing basically. he showed me that when i open my eyes to things that arent really looked at by most people...you have a lot more out there. and i do. so, all in all.....im not joining the air force. im looking at getting back into college this january but if i cant....im not gonna sweat it. there are other options out there. you might be thinking "but bob.....what kinds of jobs can you get with no college?" there are tons of em out there....and most of em arent shitty minimum wage jobs either. for example....im looking at calling someone up tomorrow to talk about a job where i'd be working on commission after they showed me the ropes on everything. its in sales.....tom brought up to me that one of my strong points is dealing with people....and being honest to the point of making anything sound good. so maybe thats where i should be. hell.....i dont really like people that much....but it seems as though when im working with them....i dont mind the little shit like ignorance and stupidity to bother me.....hell....i'd probably be asking the same questions if i was in their shoes. so im gonna make this call....and if things work out, great...if not.....then college. if both seem to fail on me, there are other things out there. i gotta just go one foot at a time. basically everyone that ive talked to about my "future" and where i wanna go in life has told me that im WAY to impatient. and i am....i know this, ive been that way for quite some time. maybe its time to relax....hell im only 20. no need to be in a huge rush right?

everyone that says "life is too short....." think again.....70+ years is a long ass time...wouldnt you like to be sure of what you want to do before you're stuck doing it for the rest of your life?

something to think on...peace

hey hey hey!!!

whats up people? sorry no post in such a long time....ive been thinking about a lot of stuff that would possibly get my life on track finally and out of this BS job and into a career. i know that most of the people that read this already know the options that i have looking at me and most, if not all, of them are pretty unhappy with one of the options.

so, instead of writing an extremely obscure post about things going on in my life ill just let everyone know. the reason why i havent been posting lately is because ive been thinking hard about ..

i am making out with my girlfriend right..........................................now anyways back to the rap.

ive been thinking pretty hard about whether im going to end up joining the Air Force or if im just gonna suck it up, get some more loans, and go back to college. im pretty sure that the people that ive talked to already think that i should stick with the college idea. but the thing is....i have no idea what i want to do in college.....electric engineering sounds nice in theory....but goddamn if i want to face three years of calculous. that, plus i have no idea what i would be interested in learning.....people say "go in undeclared...then find out what you want to do"....yeah....but then im just wasting time learning shit i might not need to know for the major i end up picking.....if i do even find out what i want. and say i pick a major.....and when i get out of college...i cant find shit to do with my degree. i mean.....i work at ameristar casino and we have dealers there with masters degrees, bachelors, i wouldnt be suprized if we had a doctorate in there somewhere.....and these people are dealers, chefs, slot technicians.......all ENTRY level positions with no previous experience necessary. its bullshit. i dont want to be one of those people that get all kinds of debt learning something that i really want to learn....and then be unable to find a job in that field.

but then the Air Force.....im basically trading my friends and four years of my life for money for college. and if i sign up....say i find out i dont want to do that anymore.....too fuckin bad. at least in college i can change majors, drop classes, or even transfer to different schools.....in the AF....im there for four years...and they get to tell me what i want to do or not want to do. that and i dont get to see my friends every friday like i do now....oh and of course the major factor DEATH.....i mean, yeah.....what i want to do in the AF constitutes me being at risk on every mission that id be put on.....and if i went in i would definately like to have this job.....but i dont know how keen i am on dying yet......never done it before and i dont plan to anytime soon.

its just a really hard decision that im gonna have to make myself......dont be afraid of putting your $ 0.02 down.....but ultimately im the only person that can make this decision for me. and it sucks.............................

time for more thinkin.

peace

HAHAHA its funny....people dont worry about visiting your page when you dont update.

guess its about time though. as of lately things have been going kind of differently than normal. im diggin the job at ameristar, i get paid quite a bit for a very easy job.....now if i could just enjoy the people i work with. i was also thinking about buying a new car. most of the people that i talk to know that ive been planning on buying a scion xA.....shown here >>

I really like this car....but now with the new decisions that i have to make for the future of myself.....i dont think im going to be able to afford the car.

ive decided that, unless i want to spend the rest of my life working at ameristar, i have to go back to school. and not for something short and temporary like massage therapy. i really need to get a degree in something, and ive decided that that something is going to be electrical engineering. i havent decided on what school i want to go to yet. but ive determined that being in debt for something like college is alot better than being in debt for something like a car. i have a car that drives pretty well....doesnt look or sound all that great but i could give a shit less. the only things i know right now are 1) i need to get back to school 2) the school cant be SOOOO goddamn rediculously expensive that ill never be able to pay it off 3) the school cant be CMSU =P and 4) i would prefer the school to be out of state.

ive been living here in independence for quite some time now, and id like to have a little bit of time outside of the place i call home. i do love this place.......well....i love the people that i have here but i really need to get out and explore the possibilities of my potential life. i dont want to be one of those people that we all see every day that have lived here all their lives and will probably die here....i cant do that. the funny thing is why i finally looked at everything this way.....my car dealer for the scion i was gonna buy told me that life is way to long to spend living in one place doing the same thing over and over again......and thats what ive been doing for the past 9 or 10 years.

i need to get out.....and college is gonna be the opening that i need...that one step i need to take to get life started. its going to be the doorway to meeting new people in a world that i dont really even know....and a pathway to a life that should have started a while ago.....hey, its my fault i didnt get on the ball sooner...but you know what, i had fun. and i'll continue to have fun.....because thats what life's about right? all work and no play make jack a dull boy......have fun every once in a while people. having the best job in the world and all the money you can imagine doesnt mean shit if you arent having fun.

anyways, i think im done with the post for now....i hope the few of you that have harped at me about updating are happy. and the rest of you....i hope that you have enjoyed peering into my life for the few minutes this took you to read.

everyone take care....and ill post in a month or so =P

peace

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so whats up people? not alot here. i guess i just got bored and decided to write in my xanga once again.

not alot is going on really. ive just been working my ass off for the past couple days. the job is really cool and everyone says that im picking up on everything really fast. today was probably the best day out of my whopping three days there. it just went by so fast it was hard to believe that it was really 10 hrs. anyways, as for everything else.....well...

car still sucks :) but thats ok because im already pricing some new ones, and hopefully here in a few months i'll be able to get one. sucks that i cant party anymore :( i didnt get to go to a full "ninja party" over the weekend. this job is prolly gonna wreck my social life. other things seem to be ok....besides the one thing that only one of the like 5 readers i have knows about.....and lets just keep that between us shall we? :) anyways, im just lucky that i have the friends that i do i guess....all of them are the shit.

so all in all, life is great....i just wish for a little clarity and guidance every once in awhile.....and of course, those wishes cant be granted....i have to make the decisions/mistakes on my own. guess it just comes down to what this bs called "fate" really wants me to do. blah. oh well. everyone take care and ill talk to ya soon.

peace